Sunday, October 31, 2010

Connections. We are all connected, connected to one other.

Once upon a time when I was very young (in the 1970's) I read a book called Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee and the story of Black Elk touched my heart so much that I read his book, Black Elk Speaks.   These books had a formative impact on me as my eyes were opened and my heart felt his pain.

As I was preparing to lead morning worship in the Piney Woods of central Louisiana, I walked out onto the Pavilion overlooking the lake nestled among the pine trees.  In an instant I was transported in my mind back to my childhood ... laying under the pine trees of Southern Arkansas, reading about Black Elk ... tears streaming down my face.

Native American religion is “a thing of the heart."  Prayers are said with the heart and are carried upon the wind ... thoughts for the heart, the soul and the mind ... Prayers that call upon us to remember who we are, where we come from and where we are going ... as we journey down the pathway of life.

It reminds me of what I have been taught about the Hebrew meaning of heart as the "center of one's being."  And what about that old saying, "Home is where the heart is." 

Connections.  We are all connected, connected to one other. 

It reminds me of the Ubuntu Theology of the great South African Episcopal Bishop, Desmond Tutu.  Ubuntu as I understand it, means … "I am what I am because of what we all are together."   Somewhere deep in my soul I know that if even one person in the world is suffering, I am suffering ... even if I don't know it. 

Connections.  We are all connected, connected to one other.  

It reminds me of the words of the great writer and follower of Christ, Paul who said in 1 Corinthians 12:12-13For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in the one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and we were all made to drink of one Spirit … One Spirit


Connections.  We are all connected, connected to one other.

I invite you to open your heart and pray this prayer by Chief Seattle in the Native American tradition.  It is called the Prayer to the Four Directions ... adapted with inclusive language:

Great Spirit of Light, come to me out of the East with the power of the rising sun. Let there be light in my words, let there be light on my path that I walk. Let me remember always that you give the gift of a new day. And never let me be burdened with sorrow by not starting over again.

Great Spirit of Love,
come to me with the power of the North. Make me courageous when the cold wind falls upon me. Give me strength and endurance for everything that is harsh, everything that hurts, everything that makes me squint. Let me move through life ready to take what comes from the north.

Great Life-Giving Spirit,
I face the West, the direction of sundown. Let me remember everyday that the moment will come when my sun will go down. Never let me forget that I must fade into you. Give me a beautiful color, give me a great sky for setting, so that when it is my time to meet you, I can come with glory.

Great Spirit of Creation,
send me the warm and soothing winds from the South. Comfort me and caress me when I am tired and cold. Unfold me like the gentle breezes that unfold the leaves on the trees. As you give to all the earth your warm, moving wind, give to me, so that I may grow close to you in warmth. Humanity did not create the web of life, each one but a strand in it. Whatever one does to the web, one does to the self.   Amen.


And Amen and Amen ...

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Spider! Spider!

Spider! Spider!
Spinning your Web
Spinning Spinning
Intricate Patterns
Delicate Gossamer
Gilded Edges
Shining in the Evening Sky
A Sunset Backdrop
A Lonely Job
For a Solitary Spider
Longing for Others
To journey with
On the Sinister Pathway 
of those Silky Strands 
Spider! Spider!

Morning Glories and Mom

My Mom loved flowers ... when I was a little girl, I remember the myriad of Marigolds she planted.  I remember them because of their strong smell.  I didn't like to smell them but they were very hardy my Mom told me.  I did love to smell the ruby red roses that grew at the edge of the house and how they made the most beautiful bouquets.  I remember how we pinned them to our dresses, she and I, on Mother's Day.   

I remember the fascinating Four O' Clocks because they knew what time to open their delicate purple petals to the afternoon sun.  They were always on time!  I remember the beautiful blue Morning Glories climbing and winding up and up the trellis by the gently sloping porch at the side of our house on dead man's curve ... yes, they really did call it that although no one died while I lived there.  Those Morning Glories ... they were quite simply ... glorious!  As I walked among the flowers at the Inn Above Onion Creek ... this week on retreat ... suddenly I saw beautiful blue Morning Glories and I remembered Mom ... again.  She would have loved them!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Remembering Mom on her Birthday ...

Three years ago we were celebrating Mom's 80th Birthday.  I think we knew it would be her last ... I think she enjoyed it.   Perhaps what I know the most about my mom is that she was the very best "Grandma" ever.  And as I sit holding my brand new grandson, I know I'll never be the Grandma she was ... I'll simply be that Grandma that I am ... singing made up songs and reading books to a three week old.  I wonder if my mom ... 
Well, there we are, mom and me.  This is the way I like to remember Mom ... young and beautiful.  And holding a baby.  My mom, she loved babies ... children and family were her passion.  I guess there wasn't much she wouldn't do for us.  I probably didn't appreciate her the way she deserved to be appreciated.  But in my own way, I loved her.  And so today, I shed a few tears and I take a deep breath and I look into the eyes of my own grandson and I love with the love that she loved with ...  Thanks Mom for loving me in the only way you knew how to love.    

Have you ever sat and pondered love?  Whose love is it that permeated your being and made you who you are?  Whose love personifies God's love for you?   

In The Naked Now, Richard Rohr writes, "If you have never experienced human love, it will be very hard for you to access God as Love.  If you have never let God love you, you will not know how to love humanly in the deepest way."   (page 140)

In Romans 8:39 Paul writes, "No power in the sky above or in the earth below--indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."  

Thanks God for loving me so that I might learn to love more deeply every day ...  

Monday, September 13, 2010

New Life!

Easton Matthew Serio
Precious little Easton Matthew, May the music of the psalms
resonate in your soul forever as you bask in God's love for you
 
O Lord, you ...know everything about me ...
You go before me and follow me.
      You place your hand of blessing on my head ...
                                                  your hand will guide me                                                 
      and your strength will support me.
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
      and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
      Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
      as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
 You saw me before I was born.
      Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
 Every moment was laid out
      before a single day had passed.
 How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
      They cannot be numbered!
 I can’t even count them;
      they outnumber the grains of sand!
 And when I wake up, you are still with me!  Amen

Grandma Cindy praying excerpts from Psalm 139

Monday, September 6, 2010

Cat on a hot ... asphalt roof!

Just saw the cutest thing ... Moley the Cat sitting on the roof ... MEOW! MEOW! MEOW!
 

Then again ... perhaps it's a weird alien cat from outer space that just landed on the roof ...
Can you see those blue/green shining eyes ...
Then again ... maybe it's an artifact ... warehouse 13 call me!
Then again ... maybe I've been watching too much TV ... ya think?

Monday, August 30, 2010

A Candlelight Labyrinth Walk

One of the most beautiful memories I have is walking the Labyrinth at Chartres Cathedral in the Candlelight.  Perhaps one day I'll write about it ...

but for now ... let me tell you about the candlelight labyrinth walk I offered this past weekend to a group of spiritual seekers steeped in the sounds of sheer silence.  The photos do not do this labyrinth vision of light justice ...

While it wasn't the cathedral, the dance of over 100 candles gently invited our pilgrims onto holy ground ... as the last person rounded the first corner, I felt the familiar tug on my heart to join the community in this walk ... dearest God, here I am, yes!
two steps forward and one step back ...
o how like the journey of life!  

Two steps forward moving in rhythm o so slowly ... 
one step back, two steps forward, one step back ... 

I surrender into a meditation of "release"  
and there it is, the great expanse
 
two steps forward nothing ...  nothing ...  
                                                      one step back nothing ... 
                                                       a great expanse of space in the nothing-ness as 
I reach the rose "window" center ... 
the center of God ... the center of my soul ... 
and I am at home ... within myself.  


I "receive" ... clarity,
love and strength for the journey 


 
 
And I "return" 
with each dancing step of the pilgrim
I am filled with the Love of God!
Amen!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

SOLITUDE

"Solitude is the furnace of transformation." 
by Henri Nouwen, page 25

It used to bother me.  The chaos that emerges when I spend several days in silence ... and it does take several days for my chaotic shadow self to emerge.  Although 2 or 3 days is good rest and much happens, it really does take 5-7 days for my true self to shed all of the outer layers of protection in order to feel safe enough to emerge.  After a week back in the world of ministry and meetings, I realize I didn't get where I wanted to get on my last stretch of silence.  I got a vision but I didn't get the realization ... I didn't feel.  Yet perhaps for now all I need in the vision!  Transformation awaits ...

Initial Concept of the Furnace of Transformation
As I engaged in Lectio Divina ... I heard, "Be ready and keep your lamps burning" in the first verse and I could go no further ... as I began to meditate I heard God say in the depths of soul
Keep the flame burning ...
Keep the flame burning ...  
Keep the flame burning ... 
Keep the flame burning ... Here I am standing once again looking into the mirror of my soul ... looking at the 2 sides of me.  And wondering, dear Mother God, where are you in all of me?  Out of the ashes and the brokenness shall rise a great light ... to reveal a new path ... a path that leads to new life.  Both sides are broken ... I know ... but only one shows her face in the light of the day.  Dear dear Shadow needs silence and darkness to come out and dance ... 

Final Painting of the Furnace of Transformation
As I engaged in Lectio Divina ... I heard, "At daybreak Jesus went out to a solitary place."  Jesus breathed in the fire of the Spirit as he walked to a solitary place.  A solitary place.  Solitude ... the furnace of transformation!  Solitude, no words only silence ... the silence that gives peace not war in the silence the war of words rages on until they fade away and there is only no words ... no words fade away until there is only the breath of God ... Spirit fills the void left by the silence as the day breaks ... starting over again ... one more time


Friday, July 23, 2010

4 days in the Silence ...

I just spent about 4 days in the silence ... Remember Elijah's journey ... "Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence." 

I love Elijah.  His journey into the presence of God through sheer silence mirrors my own ... every time!   As I let go of all of the outside influences I certainly feel like I have sustained a great wind, an earthquake, and a fire before I am able to settle into that place where it is just me and God in the depths.

On my first day I prayed a prayer with Howard Thurman as my newest companion in the silence ... I abandon all that I think I am and all that I hope to be and all that I believe I possess.  I let go of the past.  I withdraw my grasping hand from the future.  And in the great silence of this [present/cs] moment, I alertly rest my soul.    Amen.

Over the next couple of days I wandered the grounds and the rooms at the Ruah Center at the Villa de Matel in Houston, Texas ... creating an art journal,


painting with watercolors and drawing with colored pencils and oil pastels, engaging in lectio divina and centering prayer, taking photographs, and rocking ...  in the safety of the silence my sweet shadow self emerged to dance in my soul.  In a dream, I found a new depth of love for the wayward side of myself that I try to keep hidden away ... the one who feels so deeply and cries so easily! 

The Calm ... before
The Storm
One day Jesus was preaching on the sea of Galilee ... great crowds pressed in on him to listen to the Word of God.  Jesus noticed 2 empty women at the water's edge for all of the people had left them alone.  He took the women out into the water in a boat
 and he taught them together ... Wade into the deep living waters and the people will return to you.  Them women said, "Even though we have been working ourselves to the bone, because you say so ... we'll try again, together."  Adapted from Luke 5:1-7 during a Lectio Divina meditation.

On my last day I awoke with a sense of oneness with myself as I stretched into the light of day ...

And then comes joy!

Giver of Life ... Give me Life

    I raise my face to seek you ... my eyes to see your glory

    I raise my arms to embrace you ... my hands to hold you close

    I raise my soul to welcome you ... my heart to receive you 

Giver of Life ... Give me Life


Monday, July 5, 2010

A Psalm of Lament

This week in our Psalm study we are looking at Psalm 80, which is a psalm of lament.  We are trying this form of prayer as an exercise to understand how to express our deeper, darker emotions especially in times when the theology contained in our minds falls short ... Where are you, O God of my heart?   Here is a current adaptation of a lament I wrote in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina several years ago:

A PSALM OF LAMENT

1.    Call  
Oh Lord, my God and my Strength
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    
2.    Description of trouble

What is wrong with me, that you hide your presence?
And refuse to sit with me in my closet of shame
I’m lost and afraid of the darkness that surrounds me
I run aimlessly as my soul longs for you
I am desperate for you as I search and do not hear your voice
I find only empty promises and bitter blows
My heart falters under the strain
How I must disappoint you, my God and my King

3.    Plea for God to respond

Come to me in the time of my despair
Crush my spirit under the strain of my suffering
Satisfy your holiness with the cleansing of my heart
Have mercy upon me, my God and my Redeemer

4.    Statement of trust that God is listening

I will fear no longer for I trust in your everlasting presence
You listen yet choose not to respond for the sake of my soul
Your discipline will somehow save me from this material world
As you form me in an image fit for heaven, my God and my Creator

5.    Vow or expression of praise

All the days of my life I will seek your face
I will wrestle with you until you answer me
And I will praise your most holy name, my God and my Love 
Amen.
© 2006 Cindy Serio