Wednesday, March 24, 2010

What does the next moment hold ... really?

WOW!  Yesterday was quite a day.  

There I was sitting at a red light behind an 18-wheeler at a major intersection: Texas Hwy 99 and FM 1093 in Fort Bend County.  I looked up in my rear view mirror and noticed that the 18-wheeler coming up behind me wasn't slowing down ... honestly my mind went blank and I braced myself thinking that my daughter and I would be no long alive in the next moment ... unwilling filler in an 18-wheel sandwich.

Suddenly the driver swerved to the right and I quickly inched up and over as far as I could with the vehicles surrounding me perilously close.  boom! we are jarred as our vehicle was hit by the back of the trailer. We turned our heads slowly to the right to watch as the truck was driven up the concrete embankment.  It stopped at the top with a pregnant pause when suddenly the wheels were moving again back in our direction.  Slowly the truck begins a harrowing roll over toward us.  It seemed as if time entered a slow motion tunnel.  All we can do is watch without knowing if we'd have another moment of life.  Time stood still for a millisecond as the dirt rained down upon us and the truck stopped its roll ... about 6 inches from our vehicle.  I think Katie screamed while it happened and I know I hyperventilated when it was all over.  And all I can do today as I rub my sore muscles is


PRAISE GOD FROM WHOM ALL BLESSINGS FLOW!
AND ARE WE YET ALIVE!
PS:  the brakes had failed ... the truck driver walked away without a scratch ... It's a miracle.

As we move toward Palm Sunday and Holy Week ... I continue to ask myself ... what does the next moment hold ... really?  Life is precious and fleeting.  Enjoy what you have while you have it ... knowing that resurrection awaits...

Peace, Cindy

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Letting go of those last 2 points ... on the Labyrinth

I have spent a lot of years striving for those last "2 points."  When I was growing up I loved school and I was a really outstanding student.  Yet when I came home with a 98 on a test, my dad always said, "What about those last 2 points?"   I just couldn't seem to get the perfect "100."  I always seemed to leave those last 2 points on the table.  

Recently I have had some interaction with a person who reminds me of my dad and those last 2 points.  Don't get me wrong!  My dad is wonderful and I am the person I am because I do keep trying and trying and trying.  That I keep trying isn't the problem.  That I can't seem to let go is the problem.  Nothing I do seems to be enough ... for the me I used to be.   And suddenly I am not the me I am today ... I am the me I used to be, striving for those last 2 points again!  
 
Sometimes several streams of living water flow together to cleanse us of destructive messages such as the one I've been living with most of my life and that has become such a profound struggle recently.  

On Saturday I attended a Kairos Prison Ministry team meeting and was blessed to lead a meditation called "the Rock Altar."   Each person chose a rock to represent our distractions and struggles ... our burdens ... anything that sought to take our attention off of God.  I couldn't seem to put my finger on any specifics that day ... I was too distracted!  I did feel a general sense that I needed to let go of ... something.  At the end of the meditation, we acknowledged the risen Christ that lives and walks among us in the present moment.

Yesterday morning, I shared a Lenten reflection by Henri Nouwen with our church staff.  Our reflection ended with a time of sharing.  As we shared with one another we were encouraged to "let go" of our worries, especially as we struggled with things we have no control over, in order to live in the present moment of each new day.  Let go ... and live in the "now."

Last night I walked the labyrinth.  Before we walked we meditated on Luke 18:15-17 ... Jesus said, "Let the children come to me."   I put out different colors of play-do at the entrance and sprinkled small, colorful "cross" erasers in the center.   I chose a neon green blob of play-do for my walk and I began squeezing and kneading that little blob ... As I walked the way in to release, I realized that I needed to let go of some very silly little things that had began to grow and take form.  I began to feel very burdened with my emotions.  

As I entered the center of the labyrinth and sat down, I picked up a tiny cross and then another one.  Then, I recieved a word ... "Let go of those last 2 points."    As the emotions rushed forth, I flattened out my play-do so I could press those little crosses into the mushy green goo.  It was a wonderful little symbol of "letting go."  I wanted to take it with me to remember!  

After sitting there for quite awhile, resting in the light of God's amazing grace ... it was time to return.  Suddenly as I prepared to leave the center, I realized that to really (really) let go of those last 2 points I had to let go of the symbol ... and leave it behind ... but that was hard. My body didn't want to leave those last 2 points behind.   

Slowly, slowly, slowly ... I returned ... stopping here, stopping there ... 2 steps forward, 1 step back.   And so the dance of life goes on ... and on ... and on

Dear friends ... what is it in your life that you just can't seem to let go?

How might God be inviting you to dance today? 

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Let nothing disturb you ...

“Let nothing disturb you; 
Let nothing dismay you; 
All thing pass; 
God never changes. 
Patience attains all that it strives for. 
One who has God Finds nothing lacking: 
God alone suffices.”  

Nada te turbe. 
Nada te espante.  
Todo se pasa. 
Dios no se muda.  
La paciencia todo lo alcanza.  
Quien a Dios tiene nada le falta.  
Sólo Dios basta.
 
A quote (adapted) from Teresa of Avila (1515-1585)