Tiny Bubbles in the Silence

A new friend gave me a bottle of bubbles today.  Well, she gave them to me last night but they were for my day of silence today.  She wanted me to spend some time playing. And I was looking forward to playing almost as much as taking photographs in my silence. 

I walked down to a park on the lake near Christ the King Retreat House where I am attending a Hearts on Fire retreat with speaker, Terry Hershey, author of Soul Gardening and various other books.  There is just something about retreat leaders that get us to pondering and digging around in the dirt of our lives while seeking the light, yes?   He asked us, "What is it in your dirt that you are afraid of?"  And I suppose I never really moved much beyond that question, I got caught up in my digging.  There is just something about the silence that invites digging and, woe is me, I am a reflective over-achiever.  

I kept coming back to a quote of mine that emerged in some poetry I wrote last fall that I shared on my imamosaic blog called "i see you ~ come home."  I wrote it after walking the Celtic Triple Spiral Labyrinth at Grunwald Guild and it has become one of my favorites, it is just so deliciously dark.  

I carefully spread my scarf on the grass by a beautiful large tree on the top of a hill overlooking the park and the lake. I laid down in the grass and looked up at the sun and the sky peeking through the bountiful branches overhead.  I listened to the wind breathing through the leaves before finally blowing bubbles and bubbles and bubbles. I let the quote rumble around in my soul and I invited myself into using an adaptation of it to spring into some new writing:

Terrified of being trapped
in a story not written for me

But ...

what if

my story 

is a thousand tiny bubbles

floating in the air

each rainbow orb

not simply a note

in the symphony of my life

but the whole composition

echoing in the heart of God.

And me?

I am the air God breathes

 

Before I left home, I picked up a pottery prayer piece made by a potter friend of mine.  It was calling me, beckoning me to take it with me on my retreat.  There is a dragon fly on one side.  If you turn it over, it says "freedom."   I have found it a very surprising companion this week for I didn't know I was being held captive by this fear, believing it to be left behind in other fields of dirt.  Exploring it these past few days and deepening the exploration in the silence has been liberating for me, one more step in my journey toward wholeness. 

Thank you Terry Hershey for leading us on this grand gardening adventure!   Peace be with you!

One Lone Bird

One lone bird sitting in a barren tree

singing full, singing sweet, singing loud

singing only half a whole love song

In heaven she waits for her one true love

Longing for his presence, his gentle embrace

How long she wonders, will I wait?

"patiently I sit, patiently I wait"

She sings with only the echo of their love

To keep her warm in the celestial field

"I love you. I love you. I love you."

 She sings ... full ... sweet ... loud

And earth smiles as the melody of her love

falls like snowy petals from a Japanese Pear Tree

Covering his frail form with tears and kisses

He dreams of her and she longs for him

as the other half of their heavenly love song forms in his heart

patiently he sits, patiently he waits

©2014 Cindy Serio

written at Cristus St. Michael's Hospital at my father’s bedside

photo of "one lone bird" who greeted me in the parking lot as I left the evening before ... 

God is the Gentle Rain falling on my Soul

I spent last Monday in silence at the Ruah Spirituality Center of the Villa de Matel here in Houston.  This monthly day of silence is a regular spiritual discipline in my Rhythm and Rule of Life and it keeps my soul breathing.


I sat in my little room gazing out the window, watching the rain fall steadily upon the trees ... all day long, the constant sound of the rain wrapped me a deep sense of the holiness of nature.  Julian of Norwich says, "Nothing less than God can satisfy."  I am realizing that my deepest longing these days is to "be" as satisfied as the trees who stand with their face toward the rain falling from the sky ... greening in the process.  


I meditated on this line from Psalm 62:1a, "My soul finds rest in God alone."  Julian says, "God is our Full Rest."   Full Rest ... always I find that when I sink deeply into God my Full Rest, I sleep for a time in the safety of the silence with no one to disturb ... my "smart" phone tucked away so it cannot tempt me to check on the world.


In the morning, I took up my journal and wrote these first 3 lines ... fell into a light sleep and when I woke in the afternoon I wrote the next 3 lines ...


God is the gentle rain falling on my soul


keeping my soul alive


bringing life to the world




God is the gentle rain falling on my soul


drenching my soul with love


flooding the world with Presence




As I reflect on these words that emerged from deep within myself, I realize how "parched" my soul had been when I arrived to sit in the silence ... as the day unfolded my soul drank deeply of the silence and the love poured upon me.  In that present moment I felt the Full Rest who is God.


Dear Ones, may you be blessed on your journey by Full Rest and my you offer Full Rest to others with great love and affection ... Amen.

I call mySelf mosaic

I call mySelf mosaic

I lay gently burrowed, shimmering in the snow drifting on the landscape of my winter soul

I see beauty as I peer upon the brokenness I call my life

Each tiny piece of mySelf a colorful glassy light shining in the depths of the darkness found within me

Joy bleeds along deep rosy red lines into my pain spreading warmth to the cold wet earth beneath the blanket of snow

Guide me O mySelf with sparkle and moon-shine along the lighted pathway into the unknown inner expanse

Deep blue awe bubbles up soundlessly to surprise me as wonder sends fingers of delight to rub across my ageless wounds

Scars tingle, the body remembers with melancholy behind dingy lace curtains torn in the mind

Holy fear and dormant terror from ages long gone rise like mist and monsters on the bayou beyond

Earth quakes, snow globe shakes, body breaks ... fragile memories weep and watch the holy pieces gather in silence and community

I see beauty as I peer upon the brokenness of my life 

 
I call mySelf mosaic

© Poetic Self-image by Cindy Serio February 2012

In the River of My Life

sitting in the silence of the night

getting a sense of stirrings within

darkness calling

unknown spaces

deep places

sad little girl

who are you?

wondering ... wandering

so much pain in the world

so so much pain inside that little girl

crying ... crying ...crying

deep flowing waters

moving upward

bursting outward

womb of God

fount of birthing

shatters with a piercing cry

pushing forth the healing waters

salty tears ... deep red fears

mix together

flowing along

the river of my life

dear sweet tree

growing so strong

in the river of my life

let your roots drink deeply

of tears, fears and pain

draw them together

into the womb of God

into the center of my soul

into union so mysterious

let my life bloom

with nourishing leaves

of prayers and worship

along the labyrinth

of music and delight

let my life fill to overflowing

with loving relationships

and beauty divine

let me create my life with you

and color the world

with drawings and poetry

that speak of the soul

let my life be a retreat

into the silence of true rest

let my life be a journey

into the action of love so true

dear sweet tree of God

in the river of my life ...

may i always live

MY life and no other

© Image and Poetry by Cindy Serio Nov 2011

My Shadow, My Self

Collage and Poetry © Cindy Serio 2011

My Shadow, My Self

Touched Deep Within

Scattered Emotions

On the Edge

Touched Deep Within

Don't you want to Know me?

On the Edge

Tenderness Unexpected!

Don't you want to Know me?

Scattered Emotions

Tenderness Unexpected!

My Shadow, My Self

Haiku 4

Image and haiku © Cindy Serio 2011

summer mushrooms wild

exploding red-orange orb

beautiful reveal

Haiku 3

Image and haiku © Cindy Serio 2011

summer drought brings death

brown leaves crumbling decay dust

 earth welcomes gently

Haiku 2

Image and haiku © Cindy Serio 2011

Summer Rain Drops Fall

Deep Pink Flowers Fragrant Sweet

Drink Deeply Grace-Full

Haiku

Image and haiku © Cindy Serio 2011

the summer sun shines

unfolding petals covered

with specks of pollen

Haiku is a form of Japanese nature poetry.  A haiku written in English is written in 3 lines with 17 syllables with a pattern of 5-7-5. 

Like a Willow Tree

Like a Willow Tree, I am
Planted in the good, kind earth
Bending in the gusty wind
Inhaling the breath of God



Perched on my
long flowing branches
assorted birds of many colors…
red birds happy
Singing God’s praises
yellow birds hungry
Singing for their supper
blue birds wounded
singing no more

Dragonfly Dragonfly
I see you duck
Dragonfly Dragonfly
I see you dart
In and out
Out and about
come quickly to keep me company
then quickly you’re off to light on another

Why O Why, dear Spirit
do I so often feel like
an ugly tree weed
out of place, armed and ready
for someone to cut me down
toss me out, rip me up
from my tender home in the good, good earth

Weeping, Weeping
Like a Willow Tree I am!

©July 2004, rewritten June 2011

Spider! Spider!

Spider! Spider!

Spinning your Web

Spinning Spinning

Intricate Patterns

Delicate Gossamer

Gilded Edges

Shining in the Evening Sky

A Sunset Backdrop

A Lonely Job

For a Solitary Spider

Longing for Others

To journey with

On the Sinister Pathway 

of those Silky Strands 

Spider! Spider!

Secrets of the Spiral Staircase

 

Sometimes you find a picture that strikes you so deep in your soul that it captivates you for a very long time.  That is the way I felt with this one ... so I sat with it awhile and I drew my own interpretation of it ... I didn't try to duplicate it ... I just tried to let it inspire me ... then I wrote poetry with it and let it speak to me.

Secrets of Spiral Staircase

Round and round I go up the stairs
Round and round I go down the stairs

Round and round I go one step up
up to the sun
Sharp blades of light
A golden explosion
I’m blinded by the light

Round and round I go one step down
down in the dark
Mystery and pain
I’m blinded by the night

Fingers of madness tickling my mind
I’m stuck in the middle
Of my own spiral staircase 

Can't go up

No solace in the light

Can't go down
No comfort in the dark

O my soul ... I'm trapped
round and round I go

falling into the Heart of God
© 2008 Cindy Foster Serio & revised 2009

Panama Reflection

Have you ever been on a mission trip? There is just something about leaving your own culture behind to embrace humanity in a different part of the world (even a different part of the city will do I'm sure) meeting lots of different people who talk in another language (that you can't understand by the way) and who live in a different way (a lot simpler no doubt) ...

it's a mosaic experience!

We are celebrating our mission trip this Sunday so I've written this reflection from snipets in my journal to share my experience ... I thought I would share my reflection with you:

Panama … let the mission journey begin

hope emerges
for a time filled with beauty
here to be changed
i know not how
with God’s healing grace
broken hearts mend strong
in the liminal space
between what was
and what will be

rushing water of the river rolls on
chisels the rocks
till they’re shiny and smooth
foaming spray
and bouncing droplets
refresh the weary traveler
deep waters of the soul
bring forth flowers of delight

day by day
soaking rains fall
from the cloudy grey sky
lush vegetation
palm trees and hibiscus
as far as the eye can see
life abundant emerges
a profusion of beauty
touches the heart
with healing confusion

children hungry children
sadness seasons the experience
compassion wells up within
the voice of justice whispers
arising in the mist
of long-forgotten memories
a broken heart
frees the gentle breeze
to sweep through my soul

as I make my way
on the path toward home
from Panama ...

© 2009 Cindy Foster Serio