Poetry by Rilke

I just got back from a Kairos Prison Ministry Inside at the Louisiana Correctional Institute for Women. I am full of emotions and yet devoid of feeling.  It was very powerful but overwhelming at the same time.  I am suffering from the lack of process time I have left myself.  My friend Jeanna prayed and anointed me at our Service of Wholeness tonight and I cried for the women who have touched my heart.

As I remember this poem by Rilke I find myself gripped in its melancholic sense of trust as I struggle to surrender long enough to taste the consolation of God ...and remember the women who have touched my heart.      Lord have mercy ... Christ have mercy ...

A Poem by Rainer Maria Rilke, trans. by Br. David Steindl-Rast

Every now and then we let ourselves imagine 

the worst that could happen to us: 

How could we survive?  

This testimony of dedication and trust 

attests to an enduring relationship 

that goes beyond our vision, 

our hearing, 

our speech, 

our mobility, 

and even our ability to think...

a relationship which cannot be extinguished. 

In the sureness of this relationship – 

and our ability to surrender to it – 

lies consolation beyond measure.

The Shakespeare Garden

Today I walked in the Shakespeare Garden at Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary (G-ETS), which is where I have spent so many weeks here and there reading and studying and writing for a long list of classes.  Since I graduated in 2009 I have been back a couple of times and it always makes me feel a sense of peace.

After Hurricane Katrina in 2005, G-ETS was the only stable place in my life.  I was living part-time in Houston, part-time in New Orleans, and part-time visiting my daughter who was in boarding school and sitting with my mom who was in the process of dying.  My life was highly unstable ... on any given day I could find myself in any of these places.  I lived out of a suitcase for about 6 months.  Yet in the midst of all of the chaos, GET-S was there and for 2 week intervals I was able to leave my life behind.  I like to study and I like to write and I like the silence found in a gentle garden.  When I "found" the Shakespeare Garden one summer day, I was mesmerized by its beauty.

When I got here, I rushed to see if there was life yet in the garden ...

there were red flowers

and purple flowers

and the most gorgeous yellow flowers

And o what a shower 

of little pink flowers

emerge in the silence of a cool spring day ...

 

rounding the corner ... 

what joy and delight to find this furry little bunny ...

my friend on the journey ... 

may your day be filled with silence and flowers 

and gentle surprises ... Peace, Cindy

A Prayer for Easter Sunday

God of New Beginnings ... In Christ you take all of our sorrow and transform us into people of contentment.  You take our wounds and heal them so that we are whole human beings.  Take away any resentment that we may have against those who have wounded us.  Forgive us for any wounds that we have caused and help us to make amends.  While we do not take joy in the pain of the world, we rejoice in the potential for growth as the Spirit comforts and guides us.  We believe you resurrected Jesus and gave us all new life after all of the pain and suffering he endured because of your love for us.  We believe we can rise with Christ into new life today and every day as we serve you and welcome your reign in this world.  Fill our lives with the light of Christ so that others may know that you live!  Amen. Hallelujah!

A Saturday Reflection for an Easter Vigil ...

Several years ago I was on vacation with my husband, Joe.  On this very sunny and warm day, we were walking down a busy street in San Antonio, Texas.  There were so many people ... desperately trying to get where they were going and so were we.  I walked by a homeless man who was calling out, "a dollar, please just a dollar ..."  Yet, I walked by but then ... I stopped about a block down the way.  In that world of hustling and bustling, for just a moment, the world stood still for me. 

I pulled out my wallet and looked inside.  I had a $1 bill and a $20 bill and a choice to make.  So ... what do you think I did?   I chose the $1 bill ... hey, that is what he asked for.  I gave my handbag to Joe and said, "I'll be back in a minute."  He just stood there patiently while I ran off on another tangent.  He is used to it.  I walked back to that particular homeless man and reached out my hand with the $1 bill, feeling rather pleased with myself at all my effort and good intentions.  At the very moment of my most inner self-glorification, this homeless man looked deep into my soul as he said in one of the kindest voices I have ever heard, "God bless you, lady."  He meant it.  I knew it.  And the fingers of shame crawled up the back of my neck as I tingled all over.  

I couldn't get this particular homeless man out of my mind nor my heart.  Obviously I still can't!  As Joe slept peacefully that afternoon, I prayed with all of the mixed emotions churning inside me ... and I wrote in my journal.

As I meditated on the Gospel reading for Easter Day, which is John 20:1-18, suddenly I remembered my conversation with God ... and I proclaim with Mary, "I have seen the Lord!"   I hope you enjoy this excerpt from my journal ... and the drawing that emerged in my time of meditation today. 

A Homeless Man

There was a homeless man

There’s always a homeless man!

A man without a name

you gave a dollar
you walked away

Sweet conviction overwhelms me

I can’t hear your voice

I know not what to do

a man…sitting
you…standing
in front of McDonald’s
could you not have 

walked him in
bought a meal
sat awhile
heard his story 
listened to him 
loved him
that man 

is special 

to Me
that man 

could have been 

special 

to you

He was…  He is…

not enough

not nearly 

enough

Regrets…Dreams…

Confusion…Chaos

The need is so great

I have no answers

Yet I know you call…me

“I can’t” too often my response  

prepare yourself

be ready  

for when I call

there is  

always an answer
always a path 

to follow
if you will seek
you will find

the Name is Jesus © 2004 Cindy Foster Serio

© 2010 Cindy Foster Serio

Holy Friday

Is it possible to drown

in my sorrow and grief

Is it possible to cry a river

and go underneath

never to resurface

Is it possible the grief abides within

a constant companion

Is it possible I cannot be

who I am

without my sorrow

 © 2004 Cindy Foster Serio

Holy Thursday

Jesus, my Lord and friend
Are you going to wash my feet?
Dusty, dirty, tired and bare
It’s much too hard to receive
Your tender love and gentle care
Jesus, my Teacher and companion
Are you going to cleanse my soul?
Musty, fearful, lonely and dark
It’s much too hard to reveal
Who I am in reality so stark
Jesus, my redeemer and savior 
© 2010 Cindy Foster Serio